Virgin Q: Shoota
PAX: Han Solo, Hope Solo, Ben Solo and Bobby Solo.
As I arrived I knew today was going to be magical. The crisp morning air presented a slight dew upon the grass that just shimmered in the morning sunlight. A young family was deep in preparation for a birthday party in the pavilion and the park was buzzing with folks ensuring they received their daily exercise. As 7 am approached I took a moment to reflect on all that is right in the world. I am surrounded by God's grace and he has presented me with an opportunity to enjoy his glory in a tremendous setting that only he can create, with all all of my friends to help sharpen me...wait, where are my friends? Did the great quilting convention of 2018 replace our Wednesday night 2ndF I pondered?
Fear not, I shall get started and soon my friends will come rolling in on two wheels knowing they are slightly behind. Let the fun begin...
WoR
25 Imperial Walkers (IC). ...1, 2, 3...1, 2, 3...1, 2, 3 crap I forgot to say the fourth number. Am I on 25 yet? Or was that 15? Man, it is really hard to count the cadence out loud and not have anyone else say what number we are on.
50 SSH (IC) 1, 2, 3...1, 2, 3,....crap I did it again. Am I on 31 or 36. Is that 40? Just keep going until you get tired.
Here comes a car...could that be Waterboy? It's a guy...that's promising...nope he has a dog. Definitely not a PAX to join me.
10 Slow count Merkins (IC)....dangit I did it again. Why must I keep picking exercises to that require a cadence! I get to 10...I think.
Alright...let's honor our good friend Bartman and give him his 5 good mornings OYO. While I am at it let's honor Bloodclot and give him his Burpee apocalypse. That will be fun! 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5....starting to feel the burn...4 more...and then it happens. As the sweat begins to form on my brow and trickle upon the concrete...I hear it. A soft murmur off in the distance coming closer..."So did your boys abandoned you today?" It's them! The shirtless Pope admiring women from a couple of weeks ago! I panic..what do I do...I am all alone without Bartman to swoop in and give the company line. "A quilting convention was today and they all made the trip" I respond out of breath. Seconds past as the two girls pondered my response....then they died laughing. "Seriously" one inquires? Lying isn't my forte, so my response is simple..."Yup, that's what they told me." "And we weren't allowed to do burpees with y'all...oh the irony" one responds! Tell me about it. Back to work....
The THANG
Mosey away to break the tension. Head over to the playground area. Since I am clearly going it alone at this point I decide to do what I need to improve on...
50 pullups
100 WWIIs
100 dips
Let's throw in some Spicoli's I tell the group of PAX...100.
Time to mosey a little. I need the cardio help. I know I struggle in this department. Head over to the bridge/hill area and repeat what my man Tortoise did a few weeks back. I need the bear crawl/crawl bear help. Crawlbear up the hill by the bridge, half way up ATMs crawlbear to top...."You're going the wrong way another girl yells as I crawlbear up the hill." I laugh questioning my decision making at this point to continue this journey alone. Then I Burpee broad-jumped the middle section of the bridge. Rinse and repeat three more times.
Time to mosey. As I begin to mosey a running group of about 20 people comes running by me. Hey look...friends I quip...I won't be alone any longer...let me jump in. I'll hang out towards the back and get in a rhythm before I drop the MC on them..man these folks are flying...I start getting excited to have friends to sharpen me. In the CofT I'm going to name that one gazelle...and that one Cheetah...and that one road runner...wait did that guy just lap me? Where did he come from? Wait....come back running friends. Where are you going, why so fast? Good idea guys...I'll just stop here and get in some merkins. Thanks for the idea.
10 merkins...(wait is that even the name? I'm starting to question my Q'ing skills)
10 more...10 more...let's do some more pullups since it's right here. 10 more I proudly announce to the other PAX...follow my lead..1, 2, 3, whew, 4, 5, uhoh, 5.5, 6...six that's what I meant PAX, just six. NO...must get 10. Struggle through 4 more and it's time to mosey. But this time let's sprint. Still time left - So some SPARTAN 300 - Sprints with 10 hand release Merkins at the end of each - a little something Tortoise tought me. I gotta tell you guys..when nobody else is around Shoota has a whole other gear. In the sprints I was dominating the local squirrels and an older gentlemen that was jogging wondering what was wrong with me. I was like a cheetah about to pounce it's prey until the older man stopped to tie his orthopedic shoe...I laid off and stopped just short to do the merkins.
Circle up....Count'o'rama....1....Clayton Hromadka....36....Shoota. Prayed thanking god for giving me this glorious day to go out and enjoy myself and have a little comical relief. It may have been the most anti-climatic virgin Q of all time....but it was worth it.
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